estate planning
There have been some high profile cases in the news recently about people passing away and leaving behind more than sweet memories and a beautiful legacy for their loved ones. It’s sad enough when someone goes, but when the deceased’s family and friends end up with difficult issues to work through, it’s even sadder.

I’ll be honest — this situation and getting caught without disability or life insurance when you need it most — are the scariest scenarios that I can think of that can spell the most disaster for anyone, especially while the family is at its most vulnerable. Get hit by any other disaster and you can bounce back much more quickly, when your family is whole. But losing a breadwinner is like running a race on one leg. It’ll take a while: requiring a lot of training, therapy and painful recovery before you can do it.

If that talk isn’t morbid enough for you, then you aren’t like many people who’ve decided to avoid estate planning altogether because it’s just too unpleasant to face. It’s great that you are willing to read on along as I proclaim that one of the goals I have as a parent is to make sure I have an up-to-date estate plan in place. In fact, no matter what stage you are at in your life, nobody can argue that a solid plan is something you need. It doesn’t have to be too complicated, and a fairly simple will should ensure that your heirs don’t have to grapple with the state when it’s your time to go.

Entering The Mess Of An Ugly Family Feud

So what are these high profile cases in the public eye that I’ve been watching and hearing about in the media lately, where estates have been tangled and assets snared?

Feud #1

You would have to be living under a rock if you haven’t digested the Anna Nicole Smith saga in which her baby daughter, now alone in this world, stands to inherit Anna’s late husband’s multi-millions. The baby is in the midst of a paternity suit, so whoever becomes guardian of the baby, may get to receive a massive windfall sometime in the future, if the courts allow. I still cannot fathom how the money of a billionaire may potentially fall into the clutches of some random man that had nothing to do with the billionaire in the first place. How twisted is that?

Feud #2

Another story involves James Brown’s family and estate, where Brown left behind an old will that he hadn’t updated since taking up with a new lady love whom he eventually married, and siring their child. Now his wife is suing to attempt to get what is due her.

Feud #3

Quite possibly the most well-known and infamous family fight in history is that of the billionaire oilman J. Paul Getty, whose heirs sought to break up the $4 billion trust that has been the source of their fortune. It took 18 months of acrimonious court battles to appease 26 potential heirs.

So you can see that many families of famous and wealthy people have historically faced challenges in this realm. You’d think with all the money some of these big names have, that they’d know and make it a priority to spare all of $250 to $5,000 to take care of these serious matters. Now of course, I’m sure it’s not as simple as forking out $1,000 for a bunch of official papers. I’m also sure you’ve already noticed that the greater the asset base that is at stake, no amount of preparation (as in the case of Getty) will stop the vultures from diving in and getting a piece of the spoils. Maybe even an iron-clad plan won’t withstand the ravages of hungry heirs. Hopefully though, I’m not being so naive when I think this is a rare occurrence.

Unfortunately, not all family battles stem from questionable estate plans, but rather the dysfunction that already permeates an existing family, whose members, in some cases, refuse to acknowledge a working, perfectly legitimate will. In which case, the mess will be deeper and maybe even impossible to fix, and a screwed up will or trust should be the least of their worries.

But returning to the things we CAN control: getting that estate plan DONE. I’d like to investigate why people don’t bother drafting their very important documents.

Reasons Why People Avoid Estate Planning (Or Don’t Have Wills)

  • Ignorance: people don’t realize how important estate planning is.
    Many don’t understand nor realize the true pain of probate.

  • Fear and Denial: people postpone getting their estate plan done.
    It’s a grim subject and nobody wants to hear it. They really don’t. Frustratingly for me, one side of my family just turns a deaf ear to this kind of talk.

  • Indifference: people don’t care enough.
    There’s just too many other things to worry about.

  • Hassle: people think it’s too much work.
    Let me repeat: There’s just too many other things to worry about.

  • Expense: people think it’ll cost a lot of money to do this.
    The answer? No. You can do it yourself with enough research. The resources are right under your nose.

  • Procrastination: heck, who isn’t too busy to think about such a chore right now?
    There’s always tomorrow. Your odds of getting struck by lightning, falling on your head, getting hit by a truck, mugged, or trapped in a fire in the near future are so incredibly minuscule that….to wait another day won’t hurt.

Given all these various reasons for shunning or deferring the task of estate planning, I will admit that I am currently hung up on one of these points. And that’s the last one: procrastination. I know for a fact I need to update my documents RIGHT NOW but haven’t yet because I’ve been caught up with far too many other activities that are the core of life. So I’m embarrassed to say that I’ve held off on doing this for so long. So far, only my first child has been mentioned in our formal paperwork. But let me say on record right here and right now…. that all my kids are rightful heirs and beneficiaries to all our assets on an equivalent basis. So by stating this here, is such a proclamation legit?

Since I’m not sure, I’d be well served to go through these planning steps to secure the right paperwork and all the peace of mind that this exercise should afford.

Basic Estate Planning Steps: An Action Plan

  • Ask yourself these questions:
    • Do you have assets
    • Do you care who gets it?
    • Does it matter to you who becomes guardian to your children?
      If you care, then you’ll need at least a basic will.

  • Go to Nolo.com and get more information

  • Read up on estate planning

  • Consider doing it yourself

  • Or pay more to outsource the process

  • Keep everything up to date

After these steps, you are hopefully on your way to getting your wishes documented and in order. Don’t wait to get these things squared away. It’s best to tackle these things when you’re still up and about, cognizant of what’s going on around you and are in a happier, and perhaps easier place in your life. That is, do it now, while you’re still in a good mood. My hope is that I’ve scared you enough to take action; this, I’ve certainly managed to do to myself.